— DR. McCOY. METAMORPHOSIS. 3219.4

McCoy’s question recalls the medieval tale of the boy who can’t get the family donkey to pull their cart. After whipping the stubborn animal with his stick, the boy finally dangles a succulent carrot in front of its nose. The excited donkey lunges forward, pulling the cart with him, and keeps moving as long as the carrot is held there.

The debate about what motivates us is largely settled. Negative reinforcement—the stick—has limited value. Pain doesn’t tell us where to go; only to stop doing whatever we’re doing. Positive reinforcement—the carrot—is not only more inspiring, it gives us direction.

What’s more, we can apply positive reinforcement to ourselves. It works almost as well if we dangle the carrot in front of our own noses!

And sometimes we need to. For example, most of us can envision the kind of stronger, more loving person we’d like to become someday. But getting there can be hard work. There may be few rewards, and lots of pain.

Which is why, if we know we’re headed in the right direction, we should reward ourselves for every small step we take toward our goals: A night out, perhaps; or a warm bath; or maybe a quiet evening with someone special.

Think what fun we could have rewarding each other!

I will no longer think in terms of “punishing” myself (or others) for failure. I hereby promise only to reward success.

---

The above meditation is taken from Going Boldly on Your Inner Voyage © 1999-2004, IF Books.

To purchase your own copy of the book, please click here...